Creativity: Creating Memorable Characters

What is the difference between a cult and the occult? The answer will surprise you.

With the incredible, longstanding success of my second novel, 11-11-11, released back in 2011 but still hanging in there at #118,496 on Amazon’s Fiction/Coming of Age/Fantasy/Bible Belt/Zombies /High School Cheerleaders best-seller list, people often ask me:

“John, how do you come up with your characters?”

First, I drive my Mercedes to a local ramen restaurant, where not only do they have great meals, but I can get my kitchen knives sharpened.

I walk in and sit down. I say something in Japanese. They just roll their eyes.

An eighty-five-year-old lady is across from me, slumped over at her table. She might be breathing but I don’t see how, with her face immersed in the bowl of noodles.

I picture her as a twenty-year-old university student, dressed in either sexy lingerie from Fredericks of Hollywood, or a Lycra fetish costume purchased from an online store in the West Village. There’s a tennis ball strapped in her mouth.

Now . . . what is she feeling?

Suddenly, an off-duty Japanese police officer drives through the front of the restaurant on a Harley Davidson. There is broken glass and disposable chopsticks everywhere!

Inspiration!

And the plot thickens.

I thought the police officer had tattoos on his arms but they are just temporary removable sheer hosiery tattoos he picked up in Thailand, while on his police precinct’s annual sex tourism holiday.

He orders the lunch special, Salty Miso Beef Ramen with Deep-Fried Pork Dumplings on the side. Of course, all the rice you can eat is included . . . and it’s free!

Now I hear the sound of a helicopter hovering overhead. Understandably, my first instinct is that it must be American Navy Seals either conducting exercises or mounting a raid. There are so many suspicious people everywhere you look these days. Especially here in Japan!

But no, it’s a medical rescue team. Four paramedics tethered to long nylon ropes drop down onto the street out front. They rush into the restaurant. The first medic through the door grabs the old lady’s hair. He violently yanks her head out of the bowl of ramen, then gagging, gives her mouth-to-mouth. But it’s too late. Her wind pipe is clogged with congealed noodles. She is dead.

While they drag her body out of the restaurant to hoist it into the helicopter, some young boys, probably elementary school age, are passing. Several of them are taunting a pathetic little guy, who unfortunately is cross-eyed and suffers acute lymphedema. His legs look like pontoons, very unusual for someone his age. The other boys are mocking him by chanting: “Dalai Lama! Dalai Lama!”

Hmm. I don’t get this. Dalai Lama? But I can use it! Sometimes you need something a little off the wall to keep a reader’s attention.

All this time I’ve been slurping away. The food here is truly amazing! My bowl is just about empty, when a huge stabbing pain shoots through my gut. I feel like someone has stuck a samurai sword in my belly button, twisting it like they’re wrapping pasta around a fork.

Food poisoning!

I don’t know why I keep coming here. Every time I eat here — I mean every time! — it’s the same thing. I get food poisoning and spend the next six hours . . . well, you know.

My only excuse for this habitual self-sabotage is that this place has been so good for my writing. This is where it all starts. The huge cast of misfits and miscreants that populate my stories are all denizens of the social tapestry of this little hole-in-the-wall soup shop.

I’ll tell you something else. No way am I giving away my secret.

You can try Googling “ramen shops Japan” if you like.

Ha! Good luck finding it.

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Maybe you already bought a copy. But if you haven’t and were thinking about it, deluxe paperback copies and ebook copies of 11-11-11 are available from all the major online bookstores.

As an iBook from Apple . . . apple.co/1JLG0uR
As a paperback from Amazon . . . amzn.to/1krreNU
As a paperback from the printer . . . bit.ly/1OjJp4a
As a Kindle ebook from Amazon (US) . . . amzn.to/1RQzupo
As a Kindle ebook from Amazon (UK) . . . amzn.to/1SlCTvz
As a Nook Book from Barnes & Noble . . . bit.ly/1nlgS2Z
Every popular ebook format at Smashwords . . . bit.ly/1PwjEN8
As an EPUB from Indigo . . . bit.ly/1JIdpRQ
As an EPUB ebook from Kobo . . . bit.ly/2pY6mCz

Here are what readers have been saying so far about my whimsical but dark satire of life in contemporary rural Bible-belt America . . .

“If you only read ONE Book this year – This is the one to read.
John has a UNIQUE Talent to – Develop Characters,
and this book has a LOT of – Characters – in it.
John writes like a combination of – Kurt Vonnegut, Jr and Elmore Leonard.
John Rachel – Kurt Vonnegut, Jr – Elmore Leonard
It does NOT get better than THAT.
I first learned of the book on FaceBook, AND I am sure glad I did.
John is a TRUE – WordSmith – Thanks John.” – Kenneth Jarvis

“This is the best book I’ve read in a long long time. I usually stick to non-fiction and serious heady novels. So I looked at this one and almost took a pass, thinking it was just frivolous junk. I am so glad I didn’t! Not only was this book incredibly entertaining but I was greatly rewarded with some amazing insights into the human condition and a really unique perspective on contemporary American life. Sure it’s got laughs. But underneath the silliness are rich layers of thoughtful satire and profound allegory. This is a great book!” – Tom Dorsey

“John Rachel is a truly gifted author. He weaves his tales on a truly vivid and visceral level, leaving the reader breathless. A work of genius!” – Ron Ruiz

“Check out the table of contents. If it doesn’t make you want to read the book check your pulse. Interesting, fun, and witty, with a wry, sardonic sense of humor–a Vonnegut meets Christopher Moore drive-it-like-you-stole-it joyride.” – Travis Rood

“This book weaves thousands of real events into a deliciously humorous and twisted story that portrays America, its values, and the people contained within quite accurately.” – Ron Hildebrandt

Less visceral and lighter in tone than his hard-hitting tale of sexual trafficking “From Thailand With Love” “11-11-11” is nonetheless just as sharp with its satirical bite. On this faux apocalyptic sortie, John Rachel follows his aptly named hero Noah on an increasingly desperate ramble through the rural Bible-belt of America, colliding with white supremacists, meth heads and gullible politicos along the way. The American dream of being allowed to start afresh seems in jeopardy here as nearly everything the hapless Noah turns his hand to crumbles and turns to sludge. How fitting for the times we live in. – Nic Penrake